Personal Narrative: If I Am An Ordinary College Student

If anyone looked at me they would think I am an ordinary college student. I wake up every morning wishing to get a couple more seconds of sleep. I make my way to school I listen, I learn, I make my way back home and I study, or depending on the day I go to work. Some days are as simple and relaxing as these, but some are not. Some days I wish to get hours of sleep, I can sleep for 9 hours and still manage to not want to get out of bed. If I could I would just lay there all day and cry. But it is days like these that I know I have to motivate myself the most. I have recently been able to accept that I have depression. Depression has been haunting me all my life. When I was around the age of 10 I wrote a note to my sister explaining to her that I did not want to be alive anymore. Though I do not remember how I felt at the time I do know that a child should never have to feel that way. I was never abused, my parents loved me and my sister loved me, it is difficult to wrap my head around why I felt that way as a child. Throughout middle school I remember I would cry to my best friend, Maria during lunch time in hopes to have some of the pain subside. Most of what I went through at that age is a blur, but I remember it involved a lot of teasing and bullying. The hardest part of my 20 years of being alive was during high school.

Depression is something I have to deal with every day, some more than others. I do not think I can say I have escaped depression because it still haunts me but I know one day I will escape. I have grown to understand that I need to love myself and not let negative thoughts attack me and chain me down. Because of my experience with depression it help me decide what I wanted to do as a career and that is to become a teacher. During high school my grades would be slipping, but no one ever asked me why or even motivated me to work harder. I would like to be that support for children one