Men Struggle Without Anger Essay

Men struggle with anger, yet anger is a vital part of a man 's emotional life. When anger gushes like a geyser from the place of a man 's wounds, and the pain is potent enough to send him into rage, although he may feel it, he may remain oblivious to what sparked his anger. In spite of anger 's destructiveness, it is valuable for men to consider the healing side of anger as it tends to point to their deeper wounds.

Many men are unaware of their emotional wounds and struggle with the allusive mystery of why they are so angry. Robert Bly, the author of Iron John, wrote, "The savage man is wounded and prefers not to examine it," which says a lot about how men, starting from early boyhood, compartmentalize or stuff away their painful experiences

Therefore, being mindful that anger acts like a road sign that points a man to where the wounds lay hidden, and that by following anger back through the memories, emotions, and experiences of the boy within the man is how the wounds are uncovered and healing can begin.

The boy found wandering in the unconscious forest of the mind is lost and scared, and is often still raging at the perpetrators of his wounds so many years later into manhood. The boy knows where the wounds are hidden, but he needs to feel safe journeying back through the deep emotional pain to the event or events that wounded him. Working with a therapist at this point can be very helpful. Therapy is a "witnessing profession," which gives power to the inner boy to know that his wounds are being validated and affirmed by an objective and caring observer-guide.

It is important to remember that there is hope and healing for men with anger. Therapists often use "inner-child therapy" as an approach to reaching the boy within the angry man in order to heal his "rejected, shamed-self." Ultimately, connecting with the inner boy and healing the wounds is the most effective method for dealing with anger issues in