Dipper's Short Story: All The Right Places

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It was a rather bizarre day for the Mystery Shack.

Mabel and Stan had run to the grocery store early in the morning. Dipper usually tagged along, but had been up all night reading from his large collection of Two-Minute Mysteries tomes and was not going to get up, even if the Shack caught on fire.

"Suit yourself," Mabel said, giving him a kiss on the forehead as the two left together. Dipper simply groaned and turned over.

When he finally woke up formally about an hour later and saw no one was home yet, an opportunity sunk into his brain.

Everyone was gone. This was a perfect opportunity for...investigating. AKA snooping, but Dipper thought 'investigating ' sounded much better.

What better place to 'investigate ' but his grunkle 's
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It appeared to a VCR, with several VHS tapes next to it he was unable to identify in the dark. He used all of his little muscle to lift the VCR out of the room into the light, then went back for the VHS tapes.

Once they were in the light, Dipper slightly understood the part of him that was screaming not to go in Stan 's room now.

The cover to the VHS on the top of the stack was a blonde, slender woman bent over in a red thong, with a blue, vibrant Comic Sans title reading All The Right Places 4.

This was porn. 80s porn, to be precise.

Dipper made a noise of disgust, but couldn 't help his curiosity. He flipped the VHS tape over to the back.

Young, vibrant beautiful college cheerleader Carla gets through a whole series of Richard Simmons tapes and rewards herself with a nice, hot pizza with extra sausage and mushrooms. However, once the hunky pizza guy shows up, a spark immediately occurs between the two, and let 's just say Carla 's in for a whole other type of sausage!

Not to be sold to consumers under 18. Contains fully displayed intercourse and graphic nudity.

"Oh, god, that pun though." Dipper muttered to himself. Going through the whole stack of VHS tapes, they were all like this. He had just found his grunkle 's old porn stash. He was definitely not going to

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