Rowlandson Reflection On My Life

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Rowland Reflection JournalRowland, RubyColorado Christian UniversitySession 1-Instructor Sarah WightmanJournal
Rowland Reflection Journal2AroundJuly of 2017, after 18 years of marriage I divorced, I was devastated. My husband was not a bad man and had been raised a man of God but somewhere down the line alcohol won him over. He had an affair previously and I took him back as he promised he would seek help. After 7 years I realized that this was never going to happen, in fact it had worsened and his health and behaviors began to deteriorate. I was getting to the point to where it consumed me with worry about his health and my/our future and frankly I just didn’t want to be around him when he was like that. Since the beginning of our marriage
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I found all of this out in the later part of October 2016 and did not even confront him as we were hosting Thanksgiving that year. You see, his mother lived with us and any decision I made would affect not only myself but others in my life. After Thanksgiving I decided to leave the home; I just could not live that life anymore. I did not tell him what I was going to do I just did it one day while he was at work and I called him later that evening to tell him why. I am sure he knew the reasonbut did not want to admit to me. He asked me to comeback home a couple of times but I was not trusting that anything would change and within three months he had someone living with him. I had been talking to him all along hoping I would hear some indication that he would get help and then I would be willing to work on things but once he moved in this “friend”he had nothing to do with me. This went on for a while until he figured out that hisrelationship with hisnew “friend” was not going to work and then of course I started hearing from him again. At this point I knew the relationship and trust was beyond repair so I was not interested.My ex-husband has done other things since the divorce to try and get back at me and put a wedge in other relationships I have with my family. I guess he is hurt andthis is his way of getting back at me. However, to me, alcohol stole my husband and
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