I was felt the need to compare myself to others after while I stop bc I started loving myself. I was always a quite and conservative person. I was realizing the things I was doing was not me at all. So I changed my group of friends and start going through life a different way. I feel like I found myself and still is finding myself.
Taylor Jannsen made a good point when he said it is necessary to ask ourselves tough questions in life. Just like in the previous paragraph it pays to ask yourself if you are using your time in the best way possible or if you did the right or wrong thing today at school. I do find it hard sometimes because I don’t always want to accept that some of the choices I’ve made have been the wrong ones. Examining your conscience will make you feel better about the situations you’ve found yourself in. I can put this into action by recalling my actions and the choices I made during the day before I go to bed.
I am sure he knew the reasonbut did not want to admit to me. He asked me to comeback home a couple of times but I was not trusting that anything would change and within three months he had someone living with him. I had been talking to him all along hoping I would hear some indication that he would get help and then I would be willing to work on things but once he moved in this “friend”he had nothing to do with me. This went on for a while until he figured out that hisrelationship with hisnew “friend” was not going to work and then of course I started hearing from him again. At this point I knew the relationship and trust was beyond repair so I was not interested.My ex-husband has done other things since the divorce to try and get back at me and put a wedge in other relationships I have with my family.
It was a rainy day in New York, and there was road rage all across the city’s downtown, to avoid being late I walked to my workplace but couldn’t reach there as I met an accident on my way and was in a critical condition, I was transferred to the hospital by a homeless on the side walk. I had seriously damaged my liver and would die within a year. I had gain conscious after 3 days of medical attention. I was despaired, and would want to die instantly instead of dying gradually and painfully. I had locked myself into darkness and sobbed for weeks, but then realize that 365 days are all I have, I cannot earn back the time I lost but could use the time I had to fulfill all my wishes.
I couldn’t live without them, but both also had problems of their own; And being the person I am, instead of helping myself out first, I let my depression get worse and worse in exchange of helping them. I was happy of the fact that I was doing some part in them getting better in someway. I didn’t want to repeat what i felt like I did to my other friend. After a while I got to the point where I had to go to a therapist because I couldn’t handle the pain. I ended up telling my mom I needed a therapist and she got worried.
I had lived and experienced so much and yet I still had so much more to do and to learn. So why I was caught in that state? Why was I suffering and my body so ill? It took me almost a near-death experience to realize that, despite being known by my peers and teachers as an outstanding meditator with brilliant results, I was making some mistakes in my life. Some that almost costed my life.
In 2012 i told my mom i could not do it and i said i need to get away from him. So we fought and fought to get it so i did not need to go up there anymore. He complained but then we found out that i was old enough we did not need to fill out any papers and i could be myself and make my own choice. So i did not talk to him for the longest time and then something told me i needed to make plans and talk to him. He and i went to dinner which was awkward, never ending, and i wanted to leave
I would pray to God to take any feelings for girls away that I would do anything not feel the way I did. When I was in high school I finally found this guy I semi liked and eventually grew to love. In the beginning he was everything I could have asked for caring, intelligent, and humorous. Even though I loved him I knew something was missing in the relationship eventually he caught on and my wonderful changed. He became verbally abusive to me our relationship had become a worldwide of fights.
I pretended nothing was going on with me and him. She asked me a second time and I finally understood that everything we did together was wrong. I broke into tears and hugged her. She asked me a few more questions while my sister and mom were in the other room. They took some of my clothes that he touched recently and asked to speak to my mother.