Personal Narrative: My Personal Journeys

For the first time in fifteen months, I found myself surrounded by an abundance of foreigners, who were not volunteers, as I touched down at my vacation destination, Palawan. The intention of my vacation was to step away from work, refuel, and find space for myself. Although finding space for myself did not look exactly how I had anticipated, I was guided to situations that helped me recognize how much I have changed in the last year.

Taking a Solo Trip was incredibly empowering! I did have the first trip jitters while waiting for my flight, but I did not have a full on meltdown, Go me! I tend to air on the side of anxious, as I have read many woman feel before departing on their first solo trip, but in the last year I have been learning

Shutting down, blocking out, and stuffing away feelings deemed unpleasant has been a coping mechanism for a majority of my life, but in the last year, I continuously learn what it is like to be confronted with all of the emotions that arise without my usual core support system readily at my disposal. As humans, we tend to cling to the 'highs ' of our life, when times are going well, all of the euphoric emotions, we grasp them so tightly, but it is like trying to hold onto air. The moments ebb and flow in a constant state of change, and the more control we try to have over this the more unhappy we will likely be. Happy moments are wonderful, elating even, but they cannot last. Instead, be accepting and open to all emotions that come forth, not only the ones we think of as good, bring awareness to them, give them space, become comfortable with the uncomfortable. Though I have spent time working on this, I now tend to be polar of either being ecstatic or somber, with little in between, continually working on being aware of each present moment, and letting them flow freely will help moving forward. As I begin to practice this, I find more happiness within each passing moment than when I try to cling to a single euphoric