My Fear In Life

2036 Words9 Pages
Grief stains me and there is nothing left. The extraordinary life Emilie lived came to an abrupt end with her blood staining the snowy road of the car crash. There was always just me and Emilie. Mason and Emilie, Emilie and Mason. With her, it didn’t matter what people said about us for strength allowed us to overcome the bullying. But without her, I can’t hold myself up because all of their nasty remarks are put upon myself alone. Their words become their weapons. I am drowning in a sea of my own blood, and I cannot find the surface. Emilie was my lifesaver that has now sunk to the bottom. Like there’s is no saving me, there is no coming up for fresh air.

Losing myself was my biggest fear in life. So, here I am, lost, with nothing left to live for. There were no friends, no family, nothing. I couldn’t live without her, so that leads me to think that I couldn’t live at all. I started believing the lies in my life: people saying that wasn’t worthy and that I didn’t belong here. I started to believe that I was indeed a failure. I know there are billion people starving today. I know that there are 120 million sex slaves. I know that there are 30,000 car crash fatalities per year, hence there are 80 for every day. I know that, but there are scars on my wrists and a bottle of pills lodged in my throat. Considerably, this was to be a smart way to die: an overdose. My absent mother or her idiot second husband would find me a lifeless mess on the floor and there would be nothing
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