Personal Narrative: My Painful Past Experience

My Painful Past Experience As a high school student, I do not see myself having as many painful moments as others because of my lack of experience in this world but if I had to chose one in particular, I would chose the time I started doing self-harm. Some saw it as an obnoxious way of crying for help while I saw it as a way of letting all the tension I bottle up let loose. I will talk about how it all started, how I recovered, and how I reflect on it at this time. This was a very personal point in my life and I know the effects it had on me and the people around me. I will now explain in further depth. Firstly, It all started on my first year of middle school. At the time, I knew nothing of other elementary schools let alone the students in them so being hit with the diversity of complete strangers made me very anxious

It took longer than I thought to stop hurting myself because it ended up becoming an addictive and impulsive thing that I would always turn to whenever I was stressed, upset, or angry. I cannot say I fully recovered because the thought passes through my mind constantly and because I have no other way of letting out all my feelings, I ended up just stewing in them. I have been clean for quite a while and even though the thoughts are there, I try not to notice them. The one thing that made me stay clean this long is when my grandma found out; she blamed herself and cried in front of me for the first time. She did not call me silly or say that I was being ridiculous like what my parents did; she only held me and kept apologizing for not being able to help and that she never noticed. She kept begging over and over for me to never do it again and I have never felt more crushed. In that moment, I realized that doing self-harm hurts you physically but it can emotionally hurt those around you. This is what lead me to stop and think of better solutions for letting out my