Personal Narrative Essay: The Day The Clock Stopped

The Day the Clock Stopped

Mother had it

She would talk to us on the phone

Sometimes she would repeat herself and the excuse was she was getting older

There were many of us so maybe she forgot who she told the story to

I remember seeing the movie The Notebook and my heart broke when seeing the character not remember her husband

He went to see her and read her the journal she had kept and read to her their love story

I don’t know how long my Mother’s memory was decreasing

I just know that when she had an episode I didn’t care what she called me

I just wanted to hear her say “Baby”

So when I heard the words dementia it didn’t register that it would lead to Alzheimer’s

To forget your keys was one thing

To forget who the person is standing in front of you

To forget the child you birthed

To forget your spouse who you loved

To be told stories over again

Seeing others forget how to swallow

Seeing others forget where to go and smell the stench of why

I push to beat the clock

I don’t want it to stop for me

I have to write

I have to travel

I have to finish the race

I panic now when I can’t find my checkbook

I see someone I met and I say I am good with faces but bad with names

I sat down at the gate for departure and the plane left with me sitting there in a daze

When the realization hit I froze

In that moment of time

The race went by in slow motion

I realized the clock stopped

Heart in a Box

Ever since I was a little girl

I dreamed of my prince

I prepared myself,

Let down the walls to