I was scared about talking about it. I get scared facing how much I do actually miss you, so I avoid it, so it doesn 't get communicated, so you think I don 't miss you. and I 'm tired of being scared about this. I came close to slamming my head against a stone today, and it occurred to me then that that could have killed me. or as good as.
One of the grades appears to be turned in late. I asked Raul about it and he is telling me that he turned in on time? I know that AP biology is a hard class and if my son doesn 't do his part there is nothing that you can do to help him. So far, this is Raul 's worst grade ever, not only for this quarter but for his entire student life. I apologize for not contacted you before.
For twenty two minus eighteen years I have been retrying my first shot a college. Much to my distress and misery, I will never catch what the kids in my neighborhood coined the juice. The juice in this since is motivation, determination, drive, and bloodlust. I have come to the inhumane loss of hope, the end of a candidacy. I am on my last chance to prove to myself I am not a failure.
This last week was not the best. I might've bombed my Chemistry final; I studied for days from the book and practice exams. The test was nothing like I expected it to be, and now my hopes of getting into the nursing program are going down the drain. I still need to find out what I got, but I just feel defeated. Thank you for your prayers, I need them right now.
When I found out that I had to libero for one of the biggest games of the season, I was dripping with drops of nerves. I never had a lot of experience playing on varsity and especially not the libero, because on B-squad I was the setter, which is two way different positions. I had two practices before it was game time, in both those practices I was shaking with fear that I would mess up and lose this opportunity. All the upperclassmen counted on me to do a good job, I was weighed down by all the pressure of everyone. I was expected to do just as good as the senior libero did in the past, I
That day I had knee surgery, and the pain and doubt brought on by the surgery; completely and utterly devastating. While I would inevitably have to have surgery, I just wished with all my might to hold off on receiving it. I wanted to twirl my senior year, the surgery rendered my goal, my hopes and dreams. Consumed by doubt and a crushing lack of motivation after receiving my surgery, I almost entered into a state of depression. Being different has never been my goal in life, and blending in with a pair of crutches by your sides creates a very difficult challenge .
I used to be afraid that I would get my answers incorrect for every problem I solved. Last week, I saw my score on the math exam I took, and I was disgusted by the score I had gotten. For this reason, I decided I needed a good method to solve my weakness. I took a step into the shower, and I thought carefully about my life after that shocking moment. Time flew and hot water dropped down to the concrete floor.
I couldn’t wait to get home after a long time of practice. As I was going I felt it was disaster, and I deeply regretted joining volleyball. I kept asking myself, “What was I thinking?” “I have never even played a sport before.” The next I wasn’t sure if I wanted to continue going to practice or if I should quit. I didn’t want to look like a loser. So I decided to go to practice.
I remember old times as I sit back and stare out the window on a rainy Sunday afternoon. It has been about two years since the incident occurred. The thought of how you can lose someone 's trust in one second is terrifying. It takes a long time to gain someone 's trust again after it is broken. With this in mind, I learned that my actions can affect others, but on this day I also learned that trying to fit in is not always the best thing to do.
Studies and my future came last in my mind. Once freshman year and summer were over and the senior boyfriend was gone. I had a wakeup call to figure out who I was because the person I was, was not going to cut it. The following year I became extremely involved
Beginning of my first attempt at senior year, I had enough. I was tired of living behind the mask I built myself and was tired of worshiping a seemingly absent God. I wanted out. So I tried to end it. It took four days on suicide watch (georgia law requires two days minimum) and an entire month of therapy to make me realize life is worth living despite its hardships, and that maybe, just maybe, God is an entirely different being than what I had been
Angry and bitter, I stopped volunteering and participating in additional duties. All the hard work I put in led to nothing but failure and heartbreak; the sacrifices I made, the time spent, I could never get back. I remained this way until I realized that the anger and bitterness was only dragging me down. I wasn’t myself. For someone who grew up craving success, I was fully aware of people like Michael Jordan, who was cut from his high school varsity team, and Bill Gates, a Harvard University drop out.