Red Death Persuasive Speech

658 Words3 Pages
Have you been up all night thinking about how nice your house is? If you answered yes, and said that you hate all of your nice things inside of your house, then you have found the right market for a gut wrenching house. The outside of this house on 292 West Death Street has a perfect erie river right outside of your deathly front door for drowning all of the poor, helpless, little kids in the dark, dead of the night. The front door will also never close, so you can always invite the demonic murderers right into your merciless house. There has also been a recent coating of lovely new kitten blood that will have all of the evil spirits, clawing at your house wanting you to come out and play a game of death roulette. The curtain that is hanging…show more content…
I have a lovely raven for sale that is sure to annoy you with all of its little death jokes. He talks about how every night at midnight he walks the graveyard killing all of the dead spirits. The next item that I will sell to you is the heart that is beating under the floorboard. It is sure to let you know when an intense moment is about to happen by thumping louder and louder at every step you take closer to death. The red death is a perfect gift for little kids around christmas time. This gift will definitely kill your child after 30 minutes of opening the present, making you not have to purchase them any other presents for the rest of your life. The lovely chamber will allow you to torture all of your helpless victims with all of the latest torture equipment. The chamber is equipped with only one light and multiple tie down chairs. You can have fun with all of your victims in this lovely new chamber that could be yours. The final item that this horrifying house comes with is an eye that will stare you down in the dead of the night. It helps you keep your home protected by never going to sleep and will annoy you so you can make sure and wake up in time to stab your foolish victims that tried breaking in your house. So stop on by and have a horrific
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