Sternberg's Androgynous Marriage

Categorized into three styles called companionship, dependence, and interdependence, married couples can be ‘in love’, individual with their own separate interests, or maintain a healthy balance within their relationship. Marriage is a tricky institution to navigate, and no one person will get it right, but considering the evolutionary changes of society and popular movements in history, these three styles describe the different marriages and gender roles.

Before the 1920’s, men and women upheld separate gender roles in which men were the breadwinners, and females worked in the home, taking care of children and maintaining the love in the relationship. Eventually, women began to enter the workforce outside of their homes where they depended

217).” During the 1960’s, women began to get pay raises in the workforce and the women’s movement was a large focus of society. Here is when this new style of marriage was gaining popularity demonstrating how men and women are equal in their marriages. The concept of androgynous marriages arose; an androgynous marriage describes how the roles of men and women in a relationship mix their boyish and girlish duties. In Sternberg’s triangular model of love, this style of marriage lacks the component of commitment. Each partner maintains their individualism as this style emphasizes self-development over commitment and obligations, holding that a relationship is the meeting of two independent individuals (Brannon, 2011, p. 217).’ This blueprint was described once as an empty relationship with lack of commitment. Their personal interests are maintained as well. Each partner has their own personal interests they keep separate from each other and neither one of the partners maintain the love in the relationship. Furthermore, traditional gender roles are not practiced and their relationships are generally unstable. However, there is one other style of marriage which is an alternative to the Independence style called

These relationships are usually stable, they both maintain the relationship efforts, and they both develop personal interests which rarely conflicts with the dependence in most circumstances. Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love articulates that Interdependent marriages should fit what Sternberg called consummate love, the equal balance of all three components being passion, intimacy, and commitment. Couples within the companionship and independent models are out of balance, putting the needs of each other before the need of their own. This is partly due to lack of communication and mutual agreement. The ideal method for meeting each other’s needs, as well as their own needs, is through compromise. Each partner makes sacrifices for each other, the other reciprocates or they come to a mutual agreement that satisfies both partners. This style of marriage “is a healthy way of relating because each person is involved in the other person's life without sacrificing values (Mills, 2013).” Therefore, of the three styles of marriage, companionship, independence, and interdependence, the latter appears to the most