Benefits Of Monogamy

The monogamous, heterosexual marriage is the relationship preferred by the state, but it has not become clear yet, how the state enforces this model. Sure – it gets reinforced though the family itself, but that is only the short version of the story. One could argue that two things are necessary to enforce and maintain this social structure: at first, there are usually benefits; I will only focus on the economic ones, although economic rewards are not the only way in which the married couple is privileged by the state. The most commonly known benefit for married couples are fiscal savings, the german taxation system does not only benefit marries couples, it benefits couples with large differences between the incomes of the spouses – the larger

Empirically, most people’s overwhelmingly positive perceptions toward marriage and monogamy are not justified (Jackson & Scott, 2004: 3, 4). First of all this is due to the fact that many monogamous relationships are not that monogamous – ideal conception and lived reality quite often diverge a lot. While the majority of people states that faithfulness is desired or even required, depending on the study between 20% and 60% also state they already have had sexual contacts or relationships outside of their actual relationship (Mayer, 2011: 27, 28). Having been betrayed is one of the most common fears within relationships and most people have to deal with being betrayed or even betraying themselves during their lifetime. The list of guidebooks, relationship and sex gurus, online articles and counseling offers is endless. Anywhere you look you can find the ultimative sex advice to keep your man, the workout for focusing your desire on your partner only, exercises to deepen your bond and checklists that help you identify if your partner is really working overtime, or if he or she may be sleeping with the secretary. Apparently, the appearance of monogamy is more important than monogamy itself, upholding it in ourselves and in our partners seems to be a lot of work – work that does not even pay

The routine of monogamous relationships may lead to a decreasing sexual desire over time. Additionally, there is no evidence to prof or suggest that the nuclear family, not even monogamy is required to raise children appropriately or optimally (Weaver & Woollard, 2008: 513). There is also no evidence to proof that desire and love stay exclusive just because one is in an exclusive relationship – monogamy has no “protective effect” (ibid.), sexual and romantic desires toward people outside the dyad of the monogamous relationship are still very likely to be experienced. The common assumption about raising value of something restricted appears to me to be a dangerous and romanticized view on the partner as property – another tie to