The Three Components Of Robert Sternberg's Theory Of Love

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The triangular theory of love was developed by psychologist Robert Sternberg. This constitutes three components of love and they are intimacy, passion and decision or commitment.

Intimacy refers to feelings of attachment, closeness, connectedness, and bondedness. Passion encompasses drives connected to sexual attraction. Commitment refers to the short-term decision to remain with another or the long-term decision for plans made with that other. The amount of love one experiences depends on the absolute strength of these three components. Different stages and types of love can be explained as different combinations of these three components.

To find out whether one gets into a relationship for security and support, an interview was conducted with a couple, Mr and Mrs Koh. Mrs Koh concludes that, "of course, I seek relationship for security and support. Before I marry, I must choose this guy carefully and know if I can trust him to take care of me". However, Mr Koh has a different viewpoint. He seeks a relationship for companionship, enjoyment and to have a soulmate. To him, it is more for the purpose of sharing the love, helping and supporting each other. Being in a relationship also enables him to support
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Mrs Koh feels that communication is the most important foundation of a relationship. "When we lack communication, we may not know what the other party is thinking. We need to talk things out and settle disputes. We can 't sweep things under the carpet". She adds by saying that many couples breakup due to unresolved conflicts. Mr Koh believes in the same idea of communication but elaborates that the attitude one has in resolving conflicts is very important. He says," If both parties love each other, there should be an attitude of striking a compromise. It is a special skill needed to resolve slight differences and conflicts. However, if they have major conflicts all the time, then the two shouldn 't be together because it is very difficult to
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