Essay On Disorganized Attachment Style

When I was growing up, people would consider me a relatively positive individual. One would rarely see me without a smile on my face, and encouragement was a generous amount of the content I spoke. Knowing those facts, it may come as a surprise that I bear a disorganized attachment style. Individuals with this relationship style are often considered the “Debby Downers” of the bunch. They’re known for their pessimistic outlook on life, and tend to find darkness in every situation. Why, then, would a supposedly positive individual – such as myself – be classified with a disorganized attachment style? To summarize, a majority of the individuals that consider me optimistic are those whom I have a surface relationship with. I cannot comprehend disappointing another individual; therefore, I feel the need to perform to ensure that those around me are content. This behavior reflects an ambivalent relationship style. On the other hand, maintaining the act of continuous happiness resulted in me burying my emotions deep beneath the surface. When tragedy strikes, I’ll momentarily shut down and slip into a place of isolation. This behavior reflects an avoidant relationship style. In short, both avoidant and ambivalent factors contribute to the outcome of a

Thankfully, I do not come from an abusive home situation; therefore, I do not view God in a negative capacity. However, I do find myself feeling neglected by God. When I am at my worst, I almost expect more unfortunate events to follow. Similarly, when something good happens, I expect a tragedy to follow as well. This thought process hinders my trust with the LORD significantly. I am a firm believer that every event – both positive and negative – happens for a reason. However, I will often allow my relationship with others affect my relationship with God. If I cannot trust those closest to me, how am I supposed to expect the same of