Essay #2 Parents play a very important role in the lives of their children. If parents do it in the right way, it positively impacts children’s mental and emotional condition. One of the main characters from the short story “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?” by Joyce Carol Oates, Connie, does not have that kind of relationships with her parents, with who she can share her thoughts or who to get a good advice from. The main reason of all Connie’s mental and emotional problems is that her parents do not play a good role model for her and compare with the older sister. Being parents is far more than just providing children with food and clothes. It is very important that parents exist in the life of their children, support them, and be a good role model for them. Parents that are not emotionally involved in the lives of their children tend to have kids that cannot find themselves in life and struggle from lack of attention. Lack of parent’s attention and impossibility to find herself is exactly what happens with Connie. Her father does not take part in the family’s life at all. He comes home, eats dinner and never interacts with the family. He is present physically, but not mentally. …show more content…
Connie’s mother keeps picking at her for everything. The mother clearly shows that the older sister June is her favorite. June does everything right and gets praised by her mother all the time. Connie hears almost every day that June saved money, helped clean the house, cooked for the family. When the mother speaks on the phone with her friends, she favors everything that June does, and criticizes Connie. That is the main reason why Connie wants to leave with the first person who asks her to do so. From him she feels the attention that likes very much and does not receive from her family members. She does not feel supported by anyone in the family; everyone only criticizes her, tells her that her own sister is much
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Suddenly, Oates allows Arnold’s malicious side to peak through ever so slightly after Connie tells him that he and is friend better leave, and Arnold replies “We ain’t leaving until you come with us.” (6) In the beginning of the story, the author writes that Connie has two different sides and now she is showing that Arnold has two different ones as well. At this point, Arnold begins to threaten to come in the house if Connie tries to call for help. He even indicates that if she doesn’t go with him before her family returns he will harm them.
(paragraph 9 and 11). This shows that the girl is thinking that her mother is evil for leaving her, but her mother is lonely leaving so she can eventually get a better job and give them a better future. The last example is,“ ‘are you sending me to New Mexico…’ ‘Why can’t I go with you?’” (paragraph 18 and 22).
Therefore, even despite an apparent opposite position of the parents, they were able to make a necessary contribution to the Gloria's success in her academic goals. Particularly, when it comes to decisions concerning the future education and career choices, the parents' support can be very variable, even up to the completely opposite approaches. For instance, I know many families, where parents share the same behavior as the Gloria's parents while sometimes the conflict of interests reaches the point, where the parents physically do not let the child out of the house to prevent any actions against their
Overall, it is clear that Connie has three major psychological issues that caused her to make the decision to leave with Arnold Friend: insecurity, low self-esteem, and fear of relationships. While readers may not know where Arnold is taking Connie, they can infer the psychological problems from where she has been that led her to make the decision that she
The relationship between the two was so bad that Connie had homicidal and suicidal thoughts, “Connie wished her mother were dead and she herself were dead and it would all be over. “(86) Some of the harassment from the mother seemed to come from jealousy. Oates shares some insight into the mother’s past and says she was pretty at one point in time “but now her looks were gone and that was why she was always after Connie. ”(85) Her relationship with her father wasn’t much better. In fact, Oates tells us that he didn’t give much thought to anyone in the family because “he didn’t bother talking much to them.”
In the coming of age story “Where Are You Going Where Have You Been?” Joyce Carol Oates uses symbolism, conflict, and the third person to foreshadow fifteen-year-old Connie’s unfortunate, yet untimely fate. While one may think that the conflict stems from Connie’s promiscuity, it is clear to see her promiscuity is only a result to a much bigger conflict, her mother’s constant nagging and disapproval, alongside the lack of attention from her father. the author paints a vivid picture of what happens when a fifteen-year-old girl such as Connie goes elsewhere to find to find the love, attention, and approval that she lacks at home. All which is vital for her growth and wellbeing as a person.
Carol Joyce Oates’ “Where Are You Going Where Have You Been?” presents how falling into temptation leads to giving up control and innocence. Though her mother is unapproving of her actions, Connie spends her time seeking attention from male strangers. Home alone, Connie is approached by a compelling creature who convinces her to leave her life and join him on his unknown journey. Through disapproving her family, having multiple appearances, listening to music, and her desperation to receive attention from boys, Connie gives up control of herself losing the purity of adolescents and contributing to her detrimental fate. It is imperative that one should not be controlled because of a desire to impress others.
“Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been,” is about a teenager named Connie who is trying to come to terms with her transformation from childhood to adulthood. Through this process, Connie attempts to act older than she is an tries to gain the attention of boys. In “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been,” Joyce Oates portrays Connie as obsessed with men to symbolize how one’s obsession and narcissistic attitude can cause danger to seem surreal. In the short story, Carol Oates describes Connie as having two different personalities, one being a narcissistic attitude.
A classic film, Gran Torino, which was released on December 12, 2008 and directed by award winning director Clint Eastwood, displays an emotional yet drama filled story based in the outskirts of Detroit, Michigan, in a rundown town. This film shows a multiplicity of similarities to a short story written by author Joyce Carol Oates in the year 1996 titled, Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been? This short story primarily focuses on a 15-year-old girl named Connie who is obsessed with herself and her appearance. One day Connie finds herself in a less than pleasing situation after a man that she does not know very well, named Arnold Friend, shows up to her home and pressures her into leaving with him; which she complies to leave everything behind in order to protect her family from any harm. The film
In her short story "Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?", Joyce Carol Oates utilizes a variety of literary devices to strengthen the story in its entirety. This short story is essentially about a 16-year-old girl named Connie and the conflict between her desire to be mature and her desire to remain an adolescent. Throughout the story, the audience sees this conflict through her words in addition to through her behavior. The audience is also introduced to Arnold Friend, a rather peculiar man, who essentially kidnaps her. This short story by Joyce Carol Oates functions and is additionally meaningful because of her usage of literary devices.
Connie is in a constant battle with her mother about the way she looks and how she behaves, often comparing Connie to her older sister. Her mother, once like Connie, realizes she is no longer the beauty she once was and takes it out on her daughter. Connie has a “highly charged relationship with her mother” which shows the reader “both her mother's attempt to control and protect her youngest daughter, and her feelings that Connie is developing into a younger version of herself” (Caldwell). Due to this continuous judgment towards Connie from her mother, Connie
“But now her looks were gone and that was why she was always after Connie.” (Oates ). Also, there is another opportunity for friendship within the family, between Connie and her sister, however, that is lost in their rivalry and hostility. “Her sister was so plain and chunky and steady that Connie had to hear her praised all the time – by her mother and her mother's sisters.” ( ).
However, her mother has no rights or abilities to teach her daughter why things are right or wrong. They all live in the house where her father is in charge of everything. Things are right when her father agrees with, and things are wrong when her father disagrees with. Also, Lucia chastises by her father too. Lucia did not voluntary wants to chaperone her sister, but her father forces her to go after her sister and report everything.
Parents play a major role in a child’s life. Parents affect how their child behaves and who they become as they grow older. The ideal parent should be an attentive listener, have a positive attitude and love their child unconditionally. Firstly, I think that parents should always listen to their kids no matter what or else they will feel neglected.